We had our Canadian Thanksgiving last weekend, with much less hoopla than our American neighbours will have at the end of November. Ours was about gathering, and we did not have traditional turkey and pumpkin pie, but pulled pork Carnitas and apple pie, and a salad. Some roasted vegies as well. I am having difficulty maneuvering relationships with my adult children. There is a lot of angst happening, a lot of big feelings coming my way, and it is difficult to find that peace and tranquility I crave at this place in my life.
Coming out of the isolation of multiple lockdowns has made me quite rocky with my relationships. I don’t have the instinctual flow of gatherings, that I used to have. I feel as though doing my best is falling short, but I am not willing to up my effort to take on more than I wish.
And that is where I am at. Carefully doling out my time and energy while needing a lot of personal and couple time with my spouse. I think that balance will forever be my nemesis. If I looked back on all my blogs and journals over the last twenty years, balance would be the word most used.
This weekend we are heading north to visit friends who live in the forest. It will be the first time we have had an overnight visit with friends in at least four years. I am already thinking about what I will take to make my overnight stay easier. A light. A book. My pillow. Past visits have had some of us over-indulging in alcohol… I will be well supplied with fizzy water and herbal tea, from home.
Today is dark and overcast. The yellow trees and red creeper vine are popping with colour against the grey sky. Such a gorgeous autumn we are having.
Lam Unfiltered 